Disgruntled Part 2…or Not

This was a fun little exercise. A few weeks ago, I posted a 102 word flash fiction piece called Disgruntled. Some of you enjoyed it, and in your comments stated you wanted more. So I thought about it and decided it’d be fun to do a Part 2 but from the woman’s POV. Only, I really liked Disgruntled as a stand alone piece, so I was in a bit of a quandry. Well, my subconscious mind seemed to take over because it tricked me. After writing the story, I realized it read better as a poem, so I revised it. The result is kinda cool: the following piece can be read as a follow up to Disgruntled (click on the link to read it) or both pieces can stand on their own. It’s Reader’s choice! 😀

Coal Black Saviour

You watch my every move.
You think I don’t notice,
But I do. A snake, you fixate on
All my gestures; latch on to
Each of my words.
A trap, your mind catalogues
And analyzes it all.
Nothing escapes you.

I can’t forget your gifts.
You didn’t think I noticed them,
But I did. Black feathers strewn
Across my desk. Bugs piled high and
Squirming. So sick.
That word in red lipstick on the
bathroom wall.

Whore.

Jealous and bitter, you have
Become small. But
I have a gift for you.
It is heavy and coal black; it
Fits in the palm of my hand.
My saviour and true friend, it will rid me
of my terror.

Six slugs are all it takes.
Six slugs and a cleansing spray.
Then sweet, sweet peace.
At last.

Dyane Forde (Aug. 2013)

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17 thoughts on “Disgruntled Part 2…or Not

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